Tuesday, November 29, 2005

The Stepford School

Yes, a school can be too perfect.

I've been checking out schools trying to help us decide where to move. I found the web page of one that claimed to have a modified Montessori program. It's located in a place we call Corporate Woods, a fancy office park filled with law firms. I guess that should have been my first clue. "The Most Academic Curriculum For Your Child" should have been clue #2.

But still I persist, because Montessori elementary programs are few and far between around here. Extra-curricular activities. Full-time registered nurse. F-3 Tornado Shelter. Closed-circuit TV to observe the classrooms. Key card entry. But I finally picked up the undeniable scary-perfection vibe when I read that the playgrounds "...are surfaced in the synthetic “field turf” found in professional football stadiums. Our playgrounds are green in January, produce no grass stains, and are never muddy! "

Plastic grass? Hmmm. I find grass stains as annoying as the next mother, but that doesn't mean I want to ban grass. Maybe I really don't belong in the snobby suburbs.

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